Blah blah continues

 

This blog is dedicated to 2 people. Mr. Prakash Sharma, who works hard for his living, yells something like “Beeleelee leeliya”, and never fails to thank when you pay him for the Kulfi he serve in your accommodation. He wont come to know about this blog neither would he be interested. Secondly Mr perpetual smile face for being what you are. May your smile last for ever.   
  

Couple of year’s back I learned to solve a rubiq cube just to impress a girl I met in train. Well in the end the girl was not very impressed. Thing is I may not be good at impressing business but I learned that any stupid can solve a rubiq cube in 4 min if he gives it one week time. Now a rubiq cube may look so irrelevant and lifeless to some, but it tells me however tricky it seems and whatever capability u think you possess there is a DS solution simple and plain for 90% of problems in life whether you are ready to take it or not. I am happy that couple of sleepless nights I spend on cube then had brought me some goodwill lately in YOs.
   

There was a time when I believed smoking was cool. i was wrong. I understand there is nothing great in exhaling the smoke. At any point in life you can pick many reasons to quit smoking. Having an awful breath being the least of reasons. But some fucking miserable thoughts make me pretend that I don’t give a damn and I should be smoking. My optimistic self tells me that soon I would come in terms with my smoking self and can continue the abstinence.
    

AE gave me a feeling of course ending. Soon we all will be sitting in our unit wondering how fast this course passed. Months later some of us will try hard to remember the name of someone you befriended here. In next 2 years, ‘F’ type may look better with longer hair and would no longer remain an ‘F’ type I know, Kungfu Panda will be screwed royally in NE, Mr. Willys will be enjoying civil life after quitting army, Lt ‘I am right’ living next door will draw a happy end to his perfect love story, Lt ‘I am Rajput’ my neighbour will continue his adventures. I wish all of them an eventful life. 
   

They the learned say that the ultimate aim is to seek happyness in life, in whichever noble way it is. I think there could be a more realistic cause which is to see and appreciate the beauty. Now beauty need not be pleasant and joyful. It could be a complete misery like a typical fact of life. It could be more alive than some benign happiness sometimes. It’s the tragedy that touches you in a big screen. During college days from time to time I suffered from this identity crisis - a sort of directionlessness which is not rare in teenagers -. i just followed the crowd and ended up wasting lot of energy and will over things I laugh at now. I didn’t know that I was just fine and there was no need to worry. But that is the beauty, we are all just messing our way through this life to get a clear view of the picture cluttered by our own thoughts. Well the mood is not of regret, it’s joyous, and I should simply stop writing, and go to bed.
0338 31 Mar 2011

An other blah blah…

 

It all started with the red LED blinking on the right front corner of our Sand model room, behind white board where sound system is kept. It reminds me something. It tells me ‘I am life, I am hope, I am fun, and I am the despair’. I have felt all this looking at it on diff days. Let me put some associated thoughts.

I like to watch people dozing off in class as it is one moment you are so original, care little about status and goals and simply be yourself which is life all about. 

One day I was heartbroken for loosing something which was not mine. A stranger in my class came and said some kind words and I felt touched. It’s funny that such small things can make such mood swings.                    

Trivandrum is known for its good quality drinking water. Back home i drink simple tap water taken from any tap in house hold. The dusty water cooler near our class reminds similar taste and I’m loving it.                        

There is this national flag on top of a nearby building, seen fluttering from the balcony near our class. Now patriotism is a sensitive issue. If you never undergone any kind of indoctrination ever would you feel same about it, I really doubt.  

Sometimes when you are in a crowd and feel that you are a lone crow living with all cuckoos you feel sick, as cuckoos will never get the point a crow makes and vice versa. 
     

I love those panicking pigeons in my room balcony when I frighten them unintentionally.

I hate being a smoker again which I quit some times back for some reasonable reasons.

Feeling love lost for my broken violin string.
 

I am happy to know about the eerie looking ‘ F ’ type who keeps a pocketful of raisins and nibble them silently. :) , The bald and big underdog beside who can really kick some balls and enjoy riding his Willys, Mr. Kungfu panda who is going to pull some strings and win the hearts of our course real soon. They all are my lovely course mates.
 

Thank Chhetri for this wonderful song which I can’t stop listening these days,

So what is the point, this blah blah could go on. For me life seems to be a string of beads, each bead is a relationship you make. The bead could be transparent or colourful. It can be a yellow or grey or any other. The no of beads doesn’t matter, then what does? I don’t know. It never matter what dress you wear, whether you keep a moustache or speak elegant English, you find yourself within each bead, each of them a diff self.     

Time being so much for blinking LED and my sleepy self.

23 Mar 2011s

KingKong

I was formed on kingkong’s palm. Kingkong was a giant as you know. One day he was jumping from a huge tree to another. He lost grip, balance and fell down. His right hand palm was rubbed harshly against a rock and I was born without his consent or knowledge. He noticed me 5min after he fell, when I started to inflict pain. I remember, when he raised his arm and looked at me, he was not happy with my presence. But life gives u things which you do not want to have at all, but some of them are inevitable. Thus I, a not small wound was formed on kingkong’s palm.

Kingkong lived near a giant tree which was at the top of a hill. Some big rocks and a few trees made the hilltop his home. I enjoyed causing inconvenience to him. I restricted his manoeuvrability. He didn’t apply medicine on me. When I asked about it he told that he liked my presence even though I cause trouble. I understood that I am a reason for him for being lazy. After some days when I have seen the whole jungle I learned that Kingkong should be the king of jungle, but he refused to acknowledge as the king as he was so lazy to take responsibilities. There were heavier animals but he was the latest on evolution, so nature made him superior to all other living things. All small animals were his friends.

Kingkong liked to pretend great. One day he told me life is like a wound which refuses to heal. I was wondering why he is so negative and when I asked he said “I think a lot just to confuse myself why my bloody existence is pointless”. I couldn’t hold, I burst out laughing. There was no use in making him understand.

Next day, kingkong was romancing with lady kingkong in the valley. She asked him “why you love me?” He thought for a moment and said “because I missed someone like you a lot while you were not there in my life”. She thought it was a flawed reason and asked “oh I see not because I am beautiful?” He said “you were more… hey you are beautiful because I love you”. She noticed he was going to tell something else. Suddenly both smelt something strange and unusual. They saw some frightened animals scattering near the pond and felt something bad coming in their way, something big, strong and dangerous.

It was two giant Mammoths with long horns and fire in their eyes. They came to the pond and quenched their thirst. Kingkong was angry for those trespassers in his territory. He didn’t like the presence of some one strong who can be a threat. The boundary was very clear. So if mammoths dared to cross they must be ready to challenge and fight and their leader seems determined for that too. All these thoughts went through kingkong’s mind as he walked near mammoths. The leader was staring at him. Mammoth leader came close and said “You may go into exile now or fight me for your life because from now on I am going to reign”. I knew that a fight was eminent, but I was not fully healed. Putting up a good fight and driving in the point is more important than killing those mammoths which kingkong could do. But he kept silent.

To be concluded…